No it is not getting any better, thank you Brian for your dumb action

So I guess probably you are all wondering how things went yesterday at work, well first you have to know that it was not a great “weather day” here in Findlay, it was just cold and all gray, even a little tiny bit of snow (not a lot really, it was just “flurry”, where it is not even on the ground any more), anyway my point is it was a day where already you are not in a good mood because of the weather and then I start to think about what happened over the week end and I just would feel worse (if you do not know what I am talking about I guess you can read the one post I put here on my blog web site yesterday, it basically this: I said kind of a stupid thing to my friend Samantha, I guess you could say she was my best friend, anyway I messed up every thing). So I went to work yesterday at the store, you can probably guess I was not too excited about it, it is not that I do not like my job, it is just fine and I am pretty good at it (I should be because I have done it for a very long time). Anyway I was not so excited because I knew that Samantha was going to be coming in later (she works later on Mondays because of her “schedule” at the “community” college, she has classes at a certain different time or something), also because Valerie was going to be there and I knew things would be all weird with her too because she was there when I said the stupid thing, she probably knew I screwed up too. Yes it is true, she did. She was back in the break room when I was “clocking” in and putting on my apron thing (it is a thing we have to wear, not the cooking kind, don’t worry), anyway she said “hi” to me, but that is really all she said. I know she did not say she knew what happened but I think she did because she kind of had a weird look, do you know what I am talking about? I guess it is a “girl power”, because Anita kind of had that same weird look whenever she was looking at me (Kristen was off yesterday but I bet she will have that weird look too, she will be working today so I will let you know). Even Mark knew about it! Later he was helping me with some big boxes of paint or something, anyway he said, “I heard about Samantha, dude that is cold”. I did not even know what to say, so I just kind of said “yeah I guess so” and did not say anything else. So yes, every one in the world knows I am a big fat stupid head who hurts people’s feelings (I mean just Samantha really), yes, even in the comments here at my blog web site the “anonymous” says yes, I am a big “screw up”. Maybe I will check the “Findlay Courier” news paper, maybe it is “front page” or something! But it is true, anyway the worst part is coming.

Yes the worst part is when Samantha came in later after her schedule classes or whatever (I do not really know how the whole community college thing works, remember I was thinking about maybe going over there to “take classes” or something, now I don’t know if I can do that, Samantha was going to help me out). Okay anyway so I was a little nervous you can probably guess, I basically just tried to work in the back as much as I could but eventually Zach told me I needed to take a pallet of fertilizer out to the lawn and garden area (that is where Samantha works), I tried to see if some one else could do it but it was impossible. So I was out there unloading the pallet and Samantha had to walk down the aisle where I was working, so I said “hey Samantha” (there was nobody else out there, kind of a slow Monday as usual). She just stopped and looked at me, I did not know what to say, I just said “um, so what’s up anyway” or something like that. She said (okay here is the bad part, it is pretty close to what she said, it is kind of hard to forget, you will see why) anyway she said “why did you do that to me, you should have just told me when nobody was around or something, why did you have to say that in front of Valerie”. I said to her “I’m sorry Samantha I did not know” but I guess I was too quiet or something, and she said (this is even worse) “you made me look like an idiot Brian, do not even talk to me”. And then she walked away, she did not even look at me the rest of the day, she did not even say a word, actually now that I think about it nobody really said any thing to me much the rest of the day until close, just kind of whatever they had to say, like for example “hey Brian can you copy these keys” and stuff like that, it is not “hey Brian we should go to lunch at a restaurant this weekend” (actually that is something only Samantha would say) (not any more I guess).

So anyway I rode home on my bike after we closed, it was cold and dark, very lonely (today is the same). So there you go, I guess I need to get to work. Samantha will be there, I wish I could just go home where I will not screw anything up. Maybe tomorrow I will have a laundry adventure that is just crazy crazy or something so I can write about it on my blog web site and not about this, like for example maybe there will be a funny thing at the laundry place such as a crazy man wearing underwear on the outside or something, that would be pretty good I guess? (Instead I will probably burn down the dryer or something.)